Fandango Part Deux

From: dje@mail.bellcore.com (Don Eilenberger)
Subject: Fandango part Deux (Episode 2 of several) LONG

When last heard from, our intrepid motorcyclists had completed a transverse of the great state of NEW JERSEY, and were facing the wilds of New Hope PA from Lambertville NJ - after finally having descended into the Delaware River valley. If you look at a map which has NJ on it, you'll find our route took us about where if you folded NJ in half, top to bottom, the fold would be.

We whizzed across the six span metal-grated bridge at the recommended speed of 15MPH (Walk-Bikes), and almost immediately got onto Pennsylvania Rt. 32 heading north.

Typical Inn on Rt. 32

I described Rt. 32 in my Fandango report of last year - but it is SUCH a neat road, it deserves attention again. Imagine (or go there and experience) a road that is narrow, twisty, up/down, one lane bridges with a stone ledge on the west side, and the Delaware River or D&H canal on the east.

Virtually no shoulders, lots of driveways, lots of 10MPH bends (marked so - and in reality so). Now add in "Freshly Oiled" [1] and our speed on the road was probably an average of about 30MPH (which for most of the route is the marked speed limit).

Apparently this bugged some pick-up drivers following us (why is it almost always pickups that get right up your ass??), because whenever they saw a straight section of more than about 100 feet - they would pass us with only a foot or so to spare.

At the small town of Uhlerstown, we passed the barn and farm which we stopped at and asked directions [2] last year - I've since found out that the farmer also specializes in repair of Amish buggies, which explained the ones in the side barn yard.

Although we were going at what I considered a reasonable pace on the road, given its blind corners with driveways, some chap in a YUGO thought not, and to my embarrassment, on a downhill section (which I tended to take it easy on due to F/C's warped front rotor and loose gravel) - he passed both Frank and me.

We stopped shortly after this to look at a map, and Frank made one of the funniest comments I heard from him on the ride "Well - he was flogging it!" I protested that it "WAS A FRIGGIN' YUGO!" but Frank just repeated "He was flogging it." We continued on..

Rt. 32 also passes through several small villages along the river. The houses are typically stone, and frequently RIGHT ON THE ROAD - the pavement goes right up to the house. A friend (Chris BeHanna) from the NJ-Cycles list had offered us a place to stay at his home in Kinnersville, but since it was only about 2PM, we continued onward (THANKS CHRISPY!). I am greatly envious of where Chris lives - the roads and scenery are fabulous.

Shortly after passing through Kinnersville, we got lost in Easton PA looking for PA Route 611 (a red-line on the maps). Apparently there is a detour for the 32 to 611 junction, and coming from the south, one critical turn is completely unmarked (and under an underpass). Luckily, I looked down under the underpass as we passed, and spotted a 611 sign down a block, or we might still be headed west into PA.. as it was, it required a short tour of downtown Easton's one-way streets to return to the intersection.

PA Rt. 611, although not as spectacularly neat as Rt. 32 is more open, still follows the river closely for a good part of it's travel north, and offered some excellent motorcycling. At Martins Creek PA it headed almost due north, and although there were minor roads along the river (following a bend in the river to the east), I decided to continue on 611 since it was a 'green-dotted-line' road, meaning a 'scenic' route on my PA map.

We were not disappointed - the highway opened up in rolling farmland, with great sweepers and hills and dales and we achieved speeds of up to 75MPH (actually - I achieved 75MPH - the road and bends were calling to me. I finally had to stop for a few minutes at the top of a hill while Frank caught up to me).

When Frank pulled along side - he made handsigns that he needed fuel [3].. and glancing at the map, I realized that there was only one possibility for the next 30 miles.. a small town called Stone Church PA.

Stone Church must have been hiding it's church, all we found there was a combination gas station ($1.51/gallon!! WOW!), auto-body, restaurant/ice cream establishment. Since the temperature had now achieved 94 deg. F, after topping off our tanks we went into the restaurant/ice-cream place to get something cold (I ended up with a root-beer float). We both used the rest room (unisex), and when Frank returned, he was truly 'footloose'.

When Frank returned from the facilities, I was immediately surprised to hear a flapping noise, followed by a 'ting' noise as he walked. I don't think Frank heard the noises, but after about 10 steps, he realized !!SOMETHING WAS WRONG!!

Looking down - his one shoe had it's soft rubber foam sole only attached to the body of the shoe (and Frank's foot) by the toe - the rest was gently flopping along as he walked. The 'ting' noise was made by the steel arch support hitting the floor.

A plaintive cry came out of Frank "My shoe is broken - and it's only a few years old" - further questioning by me revealed that the few years were actually 30 - but they had never been worn before. Frank was clearly upset.

We walked (I walked, Frank sorta shuffled/flopped, shuffled/flopped) outside to decide what to do - seeing the owner of the body shop standing watching this, I asked him if he had any duct-tape (about the only emergency item I'd forgotten.) He did, and offered us a roll, only to say "Hold it - I've got something better" and he disappeared into the garage. Out he came with a caulking gun of industrial adhesive - which he applied generously to Frank's departed sole.. which I then duct-taped in place (couldn't resist!)

After about 10 minutes - the shoe seemed to be staying together, and we were back on our way, Frank with one shoe encased in duct tape. By this time, we'd traveled about 120 miles in 4 hours which looks a lot like a 30MPH average to me.

FRANK NOTE ================================================

END FRANK NOTE ============================================

I'll continue day one in the next episode.. where we get lost in Stroudsburg PA, Frank gets new shoes and takes a tumble in Milford PA.

This leads to roads with significant crowns in the center, and when they have been freshly re-oiled, lots of loose gravel on the road, and NO center lines. It seemed as if target fixation often caused the cage drivers on the road to start to drift onto our side when our headlights came in sight.

[2] Frank really believes in asking directions from locals. More than once, I've gotten incorrect or very incomplete directions from locals, or directions I think they just make up for the fun of it. Frank's technique for asking directions is to tell me (since I can hear) to "Go ask that guy for directions," or "flag down a car and ask them," or "lets stop at (gas station, roadside stand, farm, etc.) and ask directions."

This trip was no exception. We stopped three times to ask directions, and three times got wrong or inaccurate directions. What is even more surprising is that we had three NJ maps along, one PA map and one NY map.. all of which overlapped into the other states. In not ONE instance did I find where all of these maps agreed - in fact, I found each map had different (and wrong) markings for most of the times I needed them.

Navigation was done by guess and by golly. It must have worked, we went there and came back!

[3] This stop should have forewarned me of something that was later to become a problem - Frank was fairly frantic about stopping and getting gas. Since he piggy-backed on my credit card, I knew he only took about 1.7 gallons and it really appeared that he didn't NEED gas - he has a 3.7 gallon tank.

I didn't think about this at the time, but this problem was gonna come back to haunt me - while riding, apparently Frank started fixating on the fuel gauge on his Suzuki - which must have been designed by the BMW K bike designers.. at 1/2 tank, it read EMPTY (in great big RED letters).

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Don Eilenberger (dje@mail.bellcore.com)
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  '79 R65 FrankenCycle - der Beemer
  '87 535i BOHICA      - der Bimmer
  '75 25' Hunter       - das Boot
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DOD#1177, BMW-CCA#104316, BMW-MOA#64000
President - New Jersey Shore BMW Riders
NJ-DOD-Cycles,  Fossil Riders of NJ Inc.
        "A glutton for clubs.."
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